LIONEL PODCAST: The International Laughingstock Called the American Intelligence Community

ODNI Statement on Declassified Intelligence Community Assessment of Russian Activities and Intentions in Recent U.S. Elections

Utter and absolute horseshit (and I’m being kind). As is my wont, I read the entire document. I’m still shaking. From laughter. Please tell me that I wrote the intelligence report.  That I’m making everything up. I could tolerate my own incipient insanity rather that have to believe that the peace and freedom of the world is in the hands of the people who say they accept this document as intelligence.   

I. Proem/Prolegomenon
Good God! The mother of own goals. And by the way, there is nothing, I repeat nothing here that a college student with access to the internet couldn’t tell you. A sophomore student. Conclusory, base.
 
II. A paean to RT.
If you wanted to create a marketing campaign for RT that would highlight their capabilities and the quality of their news reporting and opinion journalism you could not have done any better. I don’t care if you hired the best that Madison Ave. had to offer. This is tops. I have to hand it to the authors of this document. They may be shitty spies, but they have a future in marketing. RT may be calling them with job offers. By pointing out what brilliant propagandists the Russian are, they, well, er, pointed out that the Russians are brilliant propagandists, so there. Putin is giving the boys a New Year’s bonus.
 
III. If you thought HTC couldn’t be more execrable.
If you wanted to make Hillary Clinton look like a execrable candidate whom the Russians saw through long ago you could not do better than give the job to these guys.
 
IV. An indictment of US opinion formation.
If you wanted to negatively compare the propaganda competencies of the US government with the Russian government, this is the doc for you. It’s more in line of the indictment. 
 
V. Maxwell Smart reconstituted.
If you wanted to parade your skills as a competent spook you would be advised to bleach bit the hard drive this was saved on. You would never live it down if somebody got a copy of it. Don’t put this on your resume.
 
VI. Why was this ever published?
If I were a CEO who commissioned a consultant to provide me with a competent assessment of my competition’s capabilities, and this is what they provided me with, I would terminate the consultant, ask for my money back, refuse to pay any future bills and possibly sue them.
 
I say all of this with “High Confidence.”
 
Now, what in the hell were they thinking? Is this what we shovel out billions of dollars for? I wonder if any of the pols that have been panting for this smoking gun are wondering now if it is not a smoking turd? But knowing pols, they will start slinging poo, as is their wont.
 
And were are the 18 agencies? I only see three here. And did these other 15 do their own research and investigation or did those agency heads just read the report and go “Uh huh. Very nice. But I’m not signing it.” We can do better than this. I think. I hope.
 
Plus. A eulogium for Mr. Hentoff and false accusations of dyed locks inter alia. 
 

%d bloggers like this: