Topless in Jersey

Asbury Park is considering allowing one if its beaches to go topless. I have to remind myself in the year 2010 that debates of such non-consequence even occur. And when you really dissect and parse the debate, it all stems from our incredible distaste and collective disgust of the female nipple, ofttimes incorrectly referred to as the areola. And mispronounced as well.

What’s funny is that old men, obese and likewise ravaged by the stressors of gravity, can waddle on to a beach with their “moobs” sagging pendulously and that’s okey-dokey. They’ve nipples and areolae. So what’s the difference?

Seriously. What? Women’s breasts are slung and harnessed by the most de minimis of straps and the like. But so long as a nipple is covered by cloth, the rest can be virtually uncovered.

This is patently and actually and truly insane. Inter alia.

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